March 17th is an exciting day because it's St. Patrick's Day. It's also my step mother and my good friends birthday. But this year it held another special meaning for me and my family. It would have been the day we welcomed our baby Bea into the world. I kept thinking that day that instead of remembering her and thinking about what could have been, I should have been looking at her little face for the first time and getting lost in her eyes. But that is not what was meant to be for that precious soul, instead I find so much comfort knowing that she's in heaven already and never had to experience the heartbreak and hurt that is so prevalent in this world. I can't wait to meet her on the other side of life one day. No, this year I couldn't quite put the pieces of the day together until the sun was setting. I couldn't imagine what would wake all of my children up an hour earlier than usual but up I got and trudged into Micah's room to get the day started. I picked him up and began rocking and cuddling him when the girls came barreling into his room shouting about a pink princess sky. They demanded that Micah and I come to the window to see it because it was beautiful! So we all crowded around the same window to view the pink sky and it was beautiful! If you remember reading in an earlier post I mentioned that whenever I see a pink sky it reminds me of my sweet baby Bea and that day was no different. I was grateful for the beauty of it but was a little overwhelmed with emotion I wasn't ready to deal with just yet so I left the kids to marvel at the sunrise and went downstairs to make breakfast. The day went on like any other day after that and from time to time I would stop and think to myself "I wasn't sure how I'd feel today but I'm doing pretty good emotionally. I'm just glad I'm not a wreck today!" When Patrick got home I mentioned that the kids needed some new shoes so we decided to drive out to Vernon Hills to go shoe shopping and eat dinner out. I drove on the way back home so I was looking out my front window at the road when the girls once again began squealing about what a beautiful pink sky they were seeing. I hadn't noticed it initially because I wasn't looking out the side window but once I looked I could see the beautiful sky that God had once again painted that day. Then, I lost it! I cried harder than I've cried in a long time. It was a mixture of so many emotions that I had pushed down all day long but out they all came in one big mess of tears and sobs. There was sadness about never getting to meet my sweet baby Bea, but the overriding emotion of the day was feeling overwhelmed by how much God loves me and knows my heart. He knows my feelings when I see a pink sky and he sent me 2 of them that day, sunrise and sunset. I began to make sense of why we all woke up an hour earlier than usual...if we hadn't we would have missed the pink sunrise. And if we would have just stayed in that evening to stay out of the cold we may have missed the pink sunset as well. But instead we experienced 2 beautiful pink skies that were sweet reminders that God knows and loves us and cares so much about us! God orchestrated our day to ensure we saw the gifts he was sending us that day.
Here are some pictures of my little leprechauns :)
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A little dark but the only shot I got of all 3 smiling.
L to R: Char, HK, Micah |
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| L to R: Micah, HK, Char |
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| Leprechauns Char & Micah |
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| HK (L) & Char (R) |
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| We made green shamrock pancakes with chocolate chips! |
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